To my Under Appreciated Husband – Happy Anniversary!

It is so easy to under appreciate the people closest to you.  I do it often.  As I was thinking of what I should do for my husband this anniversary, it hit me that he probably would really love it if I just treated him better.  Maybe you can relate.

As a mom of two young ones, I have found myself overwhelmed by physical work (washing dishes, clothes, cleaning up toys, washing the high chair tray, repacking diaper bags, making and freezing baby food, carrying my children, going to the store, restocking the refrigerator, going back to store realizing I forgot to buy something on my list. The list goes on and never ends….)  Actually about a month ago I went to the doctor because I had two cyst-like bumps. They were diagnosed as “ganglions.” How frightening right?! The cause of these ganglions, my doctor said, was probably from physical stress aka caring for my kids.  Back to being overwhelmed.  Aside from being physically stretched, there is an emotional toll too. Within the same hour I can have intense guilt, extreme anger and lotsa warm fuzzies and hugs all at the same time. It is so ironic and yeah it can be a bit too much at times.

All I have to do is trip on a toy, look at the clutter on our kitchen table or see someone’s plate of old food sitting on the table and my good pleasant demeanor can quickly turn to edgy, irritated and all that ugly stuff that your family gets to see.  My poor husband.  Its about time you got the inside story, the behind of scenes of how awesome he is and just how good he is to me.

To start off, Kevin wooed me early on in college when he cooked food for me. I lived on the first floor of my dorm and he used to bury homecooked Chinese food in the snow by my windowsill.  After college, on a number of occasions he cooked food for my grandparents while “mannying” my niece Julia.  Despite the fact that he couldn’t speak a lick of Chinese, let’s just say his food was really good, because he won my grandparents over quickly.  To do this day, my 100 year old grandma will tell people that “Kevin hoh sic zhu yeh ga (aka he is a good cook).” He pays attention to the details and cooking I would say is his spiritual gift.  What makes Kevin amazing is that even after a full day’s worth of teaching and dealing with rowdy second graders he will often come home and cook up a really good meal for our family.  I know some men whose cooking skills only were used during courtship and then I know some other men, who though are incredible, only can cook easy mac or Ramen.  God was really good to me.I am pretty proud and blessed that Kevin is good with kids too!  With his students, he’ll climb the ropes with them in PE class, give them special recess where he makes up creative games to play with them and for the past few years, he has taken his class fishing at the end of the year.  Kindergarteners know his name and he has had kids say they want to be in his class.  If you know anything about teaching, teachers work really hard.  Sure they get summers and holidays off and technically can get out early, but try teaching for a year and then you’ll know why a good number of teachers leave the classroom.  Its no walk in the park and its not cuteness and playing games all day long.  The multitasking, the grading, the curriculum, the standards, the parents.  Another reason why its not often that you see a man in the classroom, especially at the elementary school age.  Yes, my man teaches all subjects and is with his class all day long. He works hard!

Like I mentioned before, I can get irritated at him.  But when it comes down to it, I really have to thank God for giving Kevin to me.  Shoot! During his summers, I work more and Kevin stays home with the kids.  He keeps them safe, he feeds them and almost every week so far, he has taken my Maddie who’s 3 and Samuel, who’s 10 months to the zoo.  In hot summer weather??!?!? With two kids? For literally 3-4 hours at a time?  When I’m home with them, I take my kids to the grocery store to get them out of the house.  Or at most to the pool which is 3 minutes away.  He takes them to the National Zoo not with a double stroller where there is so much walking.  “Its for my kids” he says.

If I married myself, our family would be completely different. But thank God I married Kevin. For my impatience, anger and argumentative behavior, my man has a calm and cool temperament, thats slow to anger and gentle even if he is not pleased with the way things are going.  I’m chatty, he’s a super good listener.  When my grandma needs someone to keep her company because my sister is out, Kevin is a team player and has never once complained when it means we have to change our schedule.  Sometimes he’ll even keep her company when I’m not available. Last year when my sister and I wanted to go out to see a movie on its last night in the theaters, Kevin offered (I didn’t even ask!) to watch my sister’s four kids along with ours (only 1 at the time) and so singlehandedly played games with 5 kids and kept my grandma happy while my sister and I went to the movies.   He does hard work and watches the kids for me so I can run, so I can have quiet time and when I ask for help, he blesses me by doing whatever he can to make my load lighter.  He puts Maddie to sleep every night.  And makes life fun.  I could go on and on, but to my amazing, handsome, funny, creative, smart and hardworking husband, thank you for being amazing, faithful and really good to me. Our Old Country Buffet and Sarku dates are perfect and I’d take time with you anyday over any smancy fancy restaurant.  May I pray for you and thank God more for you this year. Love you babe.  I am SO blessed.